Working too hard, working too many night shifts. Saying "Yes" to everyone at work.
I've let my time and energy get spread so thin at work that I'm not being the parent I want to be.
Yesterday morning, I came home from my 8th night shift in the fortnight to find Miss 9 sitting at the table eating breakfast.
Her hair was fuzzy, fresh from bed. She had just pulled it back in a hairband without brushing it.
I was tired, so tired. I just wanted to fall into bed.
I didn't say hello, or kiss her good morning.
I grabbed a hair brush and BRUSHED that hair, quickly, careless of knots that pulled at her little head. She just sat there quietly while her head got yanked around and I made it neat.
I didn't kiss my husband "hello". I didn't cuddle my dog. I didn't tell my kids to have a good day, or that I loved them as they walked out the door to school.
I haven't blogged in 3 weeks, even though I love it, I haven't seen my friends for ages. I haven't returned phone calls ( or library books) and I haven't cooked properly for days
I am out of balance.
I cancelled last nights shift.
I have given myself a few days off.
I need to set some rules that I stick to, so that I can be the Mum I want to be.
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How do you keep the work/family balance?
Linking with Jess for I Blog On Tuesdays xxx
Learning to say no was the biggest and hardest thing that I did to get the balance right for us.
ReplyDeleteSending heaps of love, huge hugs and positive energy your way !
Me
Wow that is such a hard question to answer. I think you have done the best thing by taking a few days off to catch up. We always feel better when things are up to date and we are back in control. It is hard balancing work, mum, home, wife etc etc. Kids are very understanding. Hope you have a better week next week. Do something fun! :) Cheers, Tanya
ReplyDeleteYou made an excellent decision in cancelling that shift and giving yourself a few days off. Working is hard enough at the best of times. Working and being a mum at the same time can be exhausting, physically and emotionally, especially if you are doing night shifts. There is so much pressure put on us to be anything and everything. I really like that David Allen quote - I think that's something all mums can relate to at some time. I think it's important to be able to recognise the warning signs of exhaustion and take a step back when they crop up. I think it's also really important to spend some part of the week completely and utterly alone. I know - easier said than done! Hope you get some good rest and feel better soon. xx
ReplyDeleteI feel for you Lisa, it's sad when we are so run down we forget that little things can make such a difference to our child/husbands. I'm glad that you have said no more night shifts. Hugs and here's to finding balance soon x
ReplyDeleteSounds like you've made a start Lisa - by taking a few days off. Have a good rest and someone recently said to me - be kind to yourself! :)
ReplyDeleteI second all of the above - of course!!!! Write down the priorities - you, hubby, kids, work in that order if you think that is right and put it by the phone!!!!!!! Staple it to your head when you go back to work so you don't say yes to everything!!! Once is a mistake, twice mmmmmmm, 3 times - you're better than that!!!! Don't be the victim - say NO !!! xxxxx
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It is hard sometimes to accept we just can't do it all. Good on you for trying but even more so good on you for knowing when to step back and look after you. Hope you are feeling more balanced now. Sending some fairy wishes and butterfly kisses your way
ReplyDeleteLisa I was in this exact same place a few months ago and it was breaking me! I basically had to say to work that if they didn't cut my shifts, that I would have to leave, because I just couldn't do it. I hated feeling like I was half of the mother I should be.
ReplyDeleteHope you can find your balance again soon lovely. You've got such huge heart, wanting to help everyone. That kind of love is always going to bless you and everyone else, no matter what you do. xx