OHHHH there it is

I lost my groove for a little while there.

I'm in a weird, twilighty nothingness while I wait to go back to nursey school. 

I have struggled to find a rhythm to my days and seem to have wasted ridiculous amounts of time with nothing productive to show for it. Oh sure, washing is done (sometimes) and meals land on the table ( 4 nights out of 7) but otherwise I have felt... in a ..funk.  That word is under used but very descriptive. FUNK!

I'm kinda cranky, but not so bad you'd call me on it.  A bit disorganised but not enough to ring alarm bells. My study books are begging for some attention but I haven't totally dropped the ball.

And so this week I discovered Twitter. 

And LAUGHED.!!!

I have discovered a weird kind of parallel universe where people can express themselves (very) freely in 140 characters or less.

A world where a Mum/Mom writing a dinky little blog becomes an Editor-In-Chief . 

If you pop some self improvement quotes in your blog you can also claim to be CEO of a Self Empowerment E-Journal for women.

Have you ever blogged about a yummy dinner you had at the restaurant in town -Yay! That makes you a Food Reviewer.

Did you mention a baby product you used ( as in- "Thank heavens for disposable baby wipes or I'd have hosed her off in the garden)- you may now lay claim to the role of Product Reviewer.

Deep below all these "I'm so awesome just let me tell you.." descriptions are Mums. Just Mums. They have all known the bizarre insanity of 3 days straight without sleep. They all know (but may never admit) that the book they can recite by heart is more likely to be a Little Golden Book, they've had leaky boobs, and grey hairs. They worried for their babies and despaired over their teens. They've faced a school principal wondering how it is possible to still feel so small on the wrong side of the desk. They can pinpoint the moment when they realised there really is No Going Back.

I have read many blogs. Laughed, cried and puzzled. I have discovered new (tentative) friendships and found a new spark. 

One thing that stands out to me is the descriptions.. and I guess it relates back to my recent post about the AWESOME boy. We can either talk life up or down. We can be glass half empty or glass half full.

I am either a beleaguered Mum of 4 demanding kids, study-er and wifey stuff ... or I am CEO of a vibrant and dynamic group of future heroes, starting a brand new career and spending time with the love of my life

I will choose the second one thanks!!

Hope you are all happy and healthy, living in your own little bubble of CEO power.

xxx

Lisa

PS you can follow me on twitter - lybliss@gmail.com

I Must make amends

I wrote a quote two posts ago and couldn't find the author - but now I know - 

Mother Theresa said 

"People are often unreasonable and self-centered. Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of ulterior motives. Be kind anyway.
If you are honest, people may cheat you. Be honest anyway.
If you find happiness, people may be jealous. Be happy anyway.
The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway.
Give the world the best you have and it may never be enough. Give your best anyway.
For you see, in the end, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway." 

What a lovely gift she was to this world.
xxx
Lisa

You are AWESOME (repeat after me)

I met a Mum today in the supermarket, with her son who is 7 on a student-free day. 

She introduced me to her son and I said "hello, how are you".

This little kid looked me in the eye and said

"I'm ADHD, OCD and ODD." with a smile on his face. 

...wOw...

Did you see it? can you hear it? He didn't tell me he has traits of those disorders. He told me he IS those disorders. That little boy has heard his Mum or Dad refer to him and his disorders so many times that he has learned to define himself by them.

Not for a minute am I suggesting that he didn't have those traits, or that his parents aren't doing their best, but there is a saying ( in many variations ) that WHATEVER YOU FOCUS ON EXPANDS.

For this little guy, it seems that the focus of his world is his disorders and traits. 

What if his parents introduced him from now on as "This is Bill. He's an awesome little boy with an amazing memory and boundless energy."

The story of Winnie The Pooh  could have read alot differenty - after all, Pooh was a binge eater, Eeyore had depression, Tigger most definitely would be diagnosed as ADHD in the year 2011, and Piglet suffered from anxiety. Poor old Christopher Robin was suffering from hallucinations. And yet, they were all just friends living in a big forest, unmedicated and surviving just fine.

The fact is we all have traits of some disorder, we are all on the "spectrum", it's just a matter of where on the line we sit. I like symmetry and order. I like two of things in the garden, and I really dislike Random quilts. I like to see a pattern. It could be referred to as OCD traits, or maybe I just like the visual!

Our children become who we tell them they are.  If we tell them they are bad, sickly, worthless, troubled, naughty, or a list of disorder abbreviations, that is surely what they will become.

If we tell them they are awesome, wonderful, intelligent and courageous, just think how bright their future can be.

"Focus on your potential instead of your limitations."

Alan Loy McGinnis 

 

prayers please

hi all,

even in my upbeat, happy, "life's great" world, there are moments that bring you to your knees.

Today I am asking for your prayers.

A Mommy, newly friended to me has found out her little in-utero baby is dying. So very sad. Please pray for her and her family. Babies sometimes don't make it and I know that, but the raw, .'claw at your heart' emotion is still as fierce and hurtful for every family that experiences this loss.

If you believe in prayer, if you talk to God (in whatever format that is) please raise this family up to him.

With thanks

Lisa

Today's thoughts

I don't know who to attribute this to, but it grabbed my heart this morning when I read it. I am sure they won't mind me sharing...

Words to live by: 

If you are honest, people may cheat you. 

Be honest anyway. 

If you find happiness, people may be jealous.

Be happy anyway. 

The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow.

Do good anyway.

Give the world the best you have and it may never be enough.

Give your best anyway.

For you see, in the end, it is between you and God. 

It was never between you and them anyway! 

 

Love Lisa

xxxxxxx 

Calling Cleopatra (s)

I have been thinking about the "past life" experiences that are so often publicised. I am intrigued that everyone claims to have been someone famous. I have read the accounts of several Cleopatra's , at least two Joan of Arcs, a couple of Julius Caesars. ...

Why doesn't anyone discover that in their past life they were a toilet cleaner, or a humble chicken farmer. No-one lays claim to the dubious occupation of grape squasher as their life's work.

Why is it that some people just have to talk themselves up, even in their past lives. It isn't enough to be honest and hardworking..

What is interesting to me is that the people who I admire most in the world, and in my private life are humble, working quietly at the chore they have been gifted. One person is simply a receptionist at a little business. She doesn't make decisions about world politics, she doesn't earn millions, she is a Mum, a wife and an employee. She is also peaceful and calm, a good friend and great mother. She inspires me to be better and do better. But I don't think 200 years from now anyone will be claiming to have been a receptionist.
  
Frankly I don't want my little girls to be ex-Cleopatra's- it didn't end well for her. Nor would I like my son to be ex-Julius Caesar - not a very pleasant ending for him either. ( Joan of Arc didn't go happily either!)

Nope.. goat herders and grape squashers are we... happily going about the business of the world, without the front page headline to prove it.

Just my thinking...
xx Lisa

Back on the game

Hello lovely patient people.

Did I tell you I am studying to be a nurse?
I am and it's hard work! I am already blessed with 4 gorgeous kids, and a great husband who tolerates my scatteredness. I design for the craft industry ( although less now than in the past) and I am more than halfway towards becoming an enrolled Div 2 Nurse. I am so relieved to be over the halfway hump, but daunted by the next 10 months work. In just 2 weeks I go on placement for Acute and then straight into mental health/ district nursing placement.

For the past month I have had my head in my books, studying and writing and generally trying to inspire those tired brain cells to absorb just a little more info.

What I have learned is that evn though it is hard work, I am so much more enthusiastic about classes and assignments because I have chosen to be there...instead of because my parents said I have to go to school.
I can see where my new knowledge will be used as opposed to trying ( unsuccessfully) to figure out how far a boat would be from the cliff if the angle from the boat to the lighthouse is....BLAGGGHH.

It intrigues me that even though a teenager knows that study and schooling is essential to become independant, even then, the IMPORTANCE of that knowledge is lost on them. It isn't until often years later that they can see the point of all that algebra, analysis of written word and biology experiments.

And isn't that the same as life???? We are given lessons in life, love and learning and at the time we don't see the point or purpose. We want to skip class and go have some fun. We can't see the outcome or the relevance or the "why" of the lesson.

A few years ago we turned to IVF to have our beautiful daughter. At the time I struggled with the effort, heartache and disappointment that accompanies the journey through IVF. There were many tears. Many hopeful, heartbroken and angry prayers. Many times when I felt ripped off and let down.
And finally, our darling Sarah was born, perfect and wonderful.

Four years later I offered to donate my eggs to a couple who had no children.
Because of my experience I understood their craving.
Because of my experience I was unafraid of the IVF process.
Because of my experience I could offer real comfort when things didn't work.
Because of my experience I could celebrate with joy for them when a perfect little boy was born.



When I needed IVF for my own child I did not understand why it had to be so hard. Now looking back I see every part of it as a blessing. Lesson learned, class complete.

I hope you are happy safe and well, I hope you can see that even though times in life can be awful and unkind, there will come a time when some one else will need you to step forward and say "I've been there. It's going to be okay".
xxxx