Last year on New Years Day I wrote a post, and here's what I wrote for my plans for 2013:
"I think this year will be a year of absorbing and embracing, learning and growing and appreciating everything that I have .
I hope that I have an open and willing heart, the energy, and the grace to accept the lessons that come my way."
Turns out, those lessons were sucky, delivered unpleasantly and actually crippling.
It's a lovely notion to "embrace life's lessons" but the fact is, when you feel under threat you don't want to embrace anything or sing Kum-Bay-Ah while some anonymous spirit plucks the guitar.
You run for cover, you protect your vulnerable places and you become hyper aware of danger, threat and attack.
No sane person willingly accepts a nasty attack or a threat to their world, and frankly if I seem ungracious and defiant, it's because I believe the attacks were unkind and unnecessary.
However, I did throw it out there in writing to the universe and to blog-land that I wanted to Embrace and Learn and Grow.
I hope there is a meal on the table each night and that my kids feel safe and loved within our home.
I hope for smoother waters, a calmer existence.
I hope that those people who are not working to help and encourage my family stay away and find something else to do with their time.
I also no longer plan to calmly and serenely embrace the lesson,I plan to fight to the end, no holds barred, taking happy snaps for my blog along the way.
No mega plans for fitness or eating 7 vegetables a day, no plans for daily blogging, no plan for finding my 'authentic self' or for sitting on a beach making sea shell necklaces while I find spiritual balance.
Nope, my basic plan is to meet the day head on, knowing that I am a good person, and that I am loved by those who are important. Every once in a while, I will be awesome. Because I can.
What was your new year resolution ( if you had one?) And were you as happy as I am to wave goodbye to 2013?