not ready

I'm in a weird place right now.

A twinkling, twilightly kind of space.
Three of my children have grown to be adults.
Like....ADULTS.. !
How is that even possible?

It was a blink ago that they were wee small toddlers and I was worrying over whether they ate enough vegetables ( about 22% of the time)  or if they understood the concept of sharing ( about 0.3% of the time).

It was only yesterday I walked my sweet first born in to his Prep classroom and handed him over to the education department. It was only this morning that my first daughter lost her first tooth.
Surely it was only a heartbeat ago that I held my second daughter, fresh out of the humidicrib (and whispered, " oh my darling girl, you will be trouble").

And yet here I am, with fully grown adult children , setting forth into the world boldly and randomly in a non-mum-approved manner.

My second child is all set to fly to THE OTHER SIDE OF THE PLANET in a weeks time, all set for a cosplaying Anime convention in the good ole USA. Am I ready for that ?

arrrm.....

Nope.
No.
Hell No!

I'm breathing, and meditating and trying to remember that it's just a concept of space or distance ( and just secretly googling flight prices to the US in case I need to go and rescue/ search for/ extradite or generally bring home second child)

Sorry for the spammers

Hi everyone .

Unfortunately my change of name from Simple Loving Thoughts to Button Brain has taken an unexpected turn.

Some very enterprising spammer has registered that blog name "Simple Loving Thoughts" and is merrily spamming my old email follower list with awesome links to essentials such as herpes medications.

While I absolutely promise I did not sell your details to anyone, if you have followed by email Simple Loving Thoughts, this gives them access to you. I have asked for further support  from Blogger via their forums but right now, all I can do is apologize.

Please take care to unfollow or unsubscribe at the base of their email.

Cheers, love and best wishes

Lisa

PS This shouldn't apply to followers of Button Brain

Button Brain is Back

Well hello there!

After almost a year of sitting back and smelling the roses ( or to be more accurate, doing the hard yards at work, in mothering and wife-ing) I have discovered that I miss my little blog, and the bloggy world, very much.

I miss writing, I miss interacting and I miss knowing and acknowledging that my mess is the same messy mess as everybody else. It might be a different shape or colour, but either way we are all a red-hot mess in some private way.

I miss having a hilarious moment and having somewhere to record it. I miss the virtual high fives and the encouragement when things have gone well. I miss those moments when I talk about something personal and someone else replies "I've been there too."

My community, my support base has been less without blogging. I did not realise how much my sense of belonging came from a bunch of people who have most likely never met me in real life, but who were cheering me on, wanting the best for me and sharing the laughs and tears along the way.

So I'm reopening the blog-space that is Button Brain. A couple of posts have been removed as their content is perhaps no longer my story to tell. Everything else remains. The good, the bad and the in-between. There are posts from my early blog days that are clumsy, before I knew about the "rules". If you stumble across them, be gentle. I did my best. I wrote from my heart.

In my house:

The Button Brain household is still running along at a steady pace. The kids are still all here, under our roof, eating all my food and making me wondering if I need to build a basement for them to move into when they turn 40.

The Man I Married is still the Man I am Married to ! Phew, another year, more bridges built, more rivers crossed and more lessons learned. We are forgiving souls, even though deeply flawed, and we are a work in progress. I suspect this will always be the case.

I am a night shift  nurse, working in acute general nursing and paediatrics. I love my job. I can find the funny side of most situations and for the saddest times, I feel honoured to be there when I'm needed.

Life is good. I am looking forward to once again sharing it with you.

An everyday family tradition

What is your best thing ?

Those are the words we hear every night repeated at our dinner table.
Years ago when the older kids were just little people we started an everyday dinner time tradition, to try and focus on each other's highlights and low points in the day.

At some stage in the meal someone will ask any other person at the table "What was your best thing today? " The replies are often funny, or mundane, sometimes they are revealing and pleasantly surprising. Sometimes a best thing is as simple as the snuggly welcome home someone got from the dog that afternoon, or that they managed to shoot a netball hoop after 258 failed attempts.  I LOVE it when their best thing is whatever I've cooked for dinner.

The initiator then asks " What was your worst thing today?" Again, the answers can reveal in a sentence or two whether the replier is having issues with a subject or classmate, whether they are sad about something we didn't even know about.  It's always okay to say you didn't have a worst thing.. That is a happy day indeed !

We then ask again " What is another best thing" to finish on a positive. Once that person has given their three answers it's their turn to ask another person at the table and so we go on. Any visitors to our table are included, including grandparents, aunts and uncles, sleepover visitors, even dad's mate who came for dinner on his way to a conference !

The only rules are - we all listen to each other's answers, and you aren't allowed to say "nothing" for your best thing. If the answer is nothing we all give some helpful hints, including the fact that they have a hot meal in front of them, warm clothes and a loving family. They might need to be reminded that there is only one week until school holidays, or that they got an award at school assembly.

So what were we teaching our kids ?
That there is always more good than bad in every day.
To try and focus on the positives and really think about what worked and what didn't work in each day.

They have learnt to sit, listen and take some interest in what is going on in the lives of every other person at the table. 

When kids are little, we as parents often ask "What did you do today?" Imagine how busy little people try to summarize all that happened in the day-  Impossible! Giving them a starting place and a specific question helps them organize their thoughts.
As the children have gotten older, we've found this little tradition has been crucial in engaging our teenagers in conversation. We could ask "Have you had a good day?" and we would no doubt get a monosyllable answer. With this tradition, they have to answer in a sentence and give more than just a Yes or No response. 

We didn't realise it when we started, but this simple family tradition has become one of the most important daily events in our lives.  

Do you have a family ritual or tradition ? How do you help your child reflect on their day ?

Taking care of spiders - I must confess

Fear is a strange thing.

It can take perfectly normal, sensible people and turn them into shrieking toddlers.
There are degrees of fear.
A general feeling of disquiet over a thought or possible event.
Anxiety and worry about our loved ones. 

A raised heart rate, dry mouth, wide eyes....
Then there is the 'fight or flight' adrenaline pumping full blown : Holy sh*t I'm about to lose it, jumping around like a ninja kind of fear.

I feel it when I think about snakes. When I get surprised by a picture of one, the idea of one.

I wrote about my INTENSE fear of snakes in Snakes Alive. 

I understand the feeling, the fear, the irrationality of the reaction. I understand the superpowers a person can instantly develop in their need to escape. I want to vomit at the notion that one might be in the backyard, near my kids or my animals (or me!). I will argue loudly that snakes should all be rounded up and sent to the Galapagos Islands. Far away from me. 

And yet, weirdly when someone else is experiencing that same level of fear, over something  that doesn't really bother me, it's hard not to find their reaction hilarious.

On Thursday night my friend came to visit for a while, we chatted, made some plans...
Then she got ready to go home. I walked her out to her car in the cold winter darkness. She climbed into the drivers seat, flicked her hair and  promptly LOST HER MIND !

I have never seen anyone climb out of a car so quickly, she leapt over the centre console, levitated across the passenger seat and threw herself out the door on the other side of the car all while shrieking like a fire alarm. A spider which, according to her ,was "as big as a walrus" had dropped past her hand.

source

This is the point when you would think that as a caring friend  I would have be gentle and caring, soothing and full of compassion. And I would have been, had I not been laughing so hard I nearly peed my pants. There she is begging "Lisa, Lisa, you have to find it. Now, You have to !" And I'm snorting, doubled over in the middle of the road. 

Eventually I found some composure. The spider had of course taken itself into a small dark corner and I couldn't find it. We sprayed an entire can of fly spray in the car, closed the doors and she took my car home.  The next morning I checked again and returned her car to her, twitching from the nerve gas lingering in the car. I had checked under the seats, flipped down all the sun visors, searched in the glove box and found no spidery evilness. No doubt the poor little thing jumped out of the car as quickly as she did and went to find more welcoming accommodations. 

That's why we are friends. I will take over when walrus spiders attack her, and she will protect me when nasty evil snakes cross my path. 
Because that's what friends are for.

What is your irrational fear? Have you ever had to face it?

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Linking up this week with Raychael from Ms Mystery Case for I Must Confess

Please visit Raychael for more bloggy confessions, and the prompt for next weeks exposé.

Sticky Tape

This morning as I was getting myself and our household on track for the day, Miss 10 went to the stationery drawer and found the clear sticky tape. 

As her room is already overflowing with crafty bits and pieces pilfered from that drawer, I stopped her and told her whatever she needed to tape up, she should bring it out to the table & do it there. 

I kept going with morning tasks in the kitchen. I could hear the sound of sticky tape being pulled off. Gosh she was using a lot of it. I turned around to find her happily sticky taping her tragically broken sneakers together for sport! 

I died ! 

Firstly, how completely and innocently unpretentious is she, that she didn't even think to ask for new sneakers? 

Secondly, obviously I've been parenting with blinkers on for a few months, cos I had no idea the state they were in ! 

We raced to the local department store before school started and bought new sneakers, and sticky tape. 

Just another Mother Of The Year moment ! 

Dealing with Teenagers

I must confess, when we decided to start our family at the tender ages of 21 and 22, we planned a pregnancy. A baby, maybe we projected far enough to toddler-hood and the first year of school. But honestly, most of the "Let's start a family" discussion was really "Let's have a baby".

But babies have a strange little habit of growing.

And they become tantruming toddlers, and boundary pushing children. They become smelly and busy school kids. 

And then... then they become teenagers.

Dealing with teenagers can be fun and funny, it can be enlightening, rewarding and awesome. It can also drive you demented and make you want to stab yourself in the eye with a teaspoon.

Trying to communicate with teenagers and anticipate their moods is a hit and miss game of epic proportion.

I can't remember a day in the past 4 years when at least one of my teens wasn't defensive, moody and offended by something I said.

I know I know, just let it go... 

... except it's bloody hard to keep on trucking through the bewildering and unpredictable spurts of anger and still lovingly care for the large darlings.

Today in the space of an hour I managed to annoy Miss 18 by asking her to write her work shifts on the calendar ( you know, so I can DRIVE HER TO WORK ! )

I am now receiving the silent treatment from Miss 16 because I bought the wrong sort of bread ( actually someone else bought the bread but apparently I am the Grand Pooh Bah of food stuffs in our home so the buck stops here). 

Someone called the house asking for him, so I made the outrageous decision to wake Mr 20 at 8am and clearly he's not appreciating the gesture, given the huffing and muttering from his bedroom.

And Miss 10 , a newly minted tween as of last Thursday has begun teen-practice, so she was truly angry, sulky and generally unpleasant because she had to brush her hair for school.

Right now, the only ones in the house who aren't displeased with me are the fluffy four legged members.

(actually the cat doesn't like me much either).

Linking up with Ann from Help I'm Stuck for I Must Confess Monday, 
holiday hosting for lovely Kirsty who is having a much deserved break xx

AUTISM ALERT - free printable

I am blessed that in our home autism has not significantly compromised the safety of our family members, but many families with an autistic loved one have to make plans for emergencies.

One thing I'd not really thought about was alerting emergency responders to the fact that a person with autism is present.

The more I think about it, the more I can see how essential it would be to be able to let a police officer entering your home know that a person with autism lives there. That they may not respond to verbal commands. They may be non-compliant THROUGH NO FAULT OF THEIR OWN.

I think about the urgency of letting responders to a car accident know that an  person with autism may have been in the car. That they may resist help, or they might have run away and be hiding in nearby bushes or buildings.

I have seen alerts available, most requiring ordering ( & payment) and shipping.

I have made a free printable and I am more than happy for you to share it far and wide, sharing is caring xxx

CLICK HERE to go to the free PDF download, hosted through a safe file storage Mediafire. ( the pic here is just to show you what it looks like, not high enough resolution for printing) 

I have made two sizes, one that is about half the size of a piece of A4 paper, perfect for putting at the front door to alert visitors and a smaller version that could go in a car window without obstructing driving vision. Print them out and laminate them. 

Given with love x

Littlest turns 10 today - Thankful Thursday

It's Thursday, Thankful Thursday.

I don't have to look too far.
My littlest baby is ten today.

I am so very Thankful to have her in my life, she makes me laugh and cry, she grabs my heart and twists me around her not so little fingers.

She is home from school, sick with a temperature and a sore throat. The bonus of that is having a day to play with your new presents, to have complete control of the remote control, and to help Mum make the birthday cake.

The other bonus is I get to just watch her, today and marvel at how a teeny tiny whisper of a wish has turned into this beautiful girl. I am thankful.
Thankful for her and all she brings to my life.

Now commencing gratuitous photo sharing :-)

A House Divided

Our home is clearly divided. 
Four who do and two who do not.
I'm on the larger team, and as far as I can tell, there is nothing remotely attractive about crossing to the other side.

photo credit

Four Sleeper-Inners.  (Sleeper Innerers. Sleep Inners, people who stay asleep after the crack of dawn)

On my team I am the captain, after many years experience of that delicious snooze-state. I love the blissful moment when you emerge out of a deep sleep, remember that there is nothing urgent on the calendar for today, and roll over to submerge into dreams again. Heaven!

J-man is 20 ( holy shamoly, my heart stutters when I write that number.. 20 ! But I digress) .. ahem J-man perfected the art of sleeping in around the age of 12 and has refined his skills to the point where we are lucky to see him before lunchtime.

Miss 16 has been sleeping in since a similar age, she works hardest at it on days when she has stuff to do, like.. school. But on the weekend, she will slumber away until she can hear the sounds of morning tea or her frantic Facebook updates become too urgent to ignore.

Miss 9 may not actually sleep in all the time ( although she regularly hits 9am before she opens her eyes) but she understands the importance of a leisurely rising. Playing on her iPod, reading in bed, talking to her dolls. She is that rare blessing of a child who waits until someone tells her she can get up.

Leading the opposing team of Annoyingly Cheerful Early Risers is The Man I Married. He jumps out of bed at the first break of dawn, happy, chipper and annoyingly loud. He makes a coffee LOUDLY,he munches toast LOUDLY, he greets the dogs LOUDLY, he ponders what he'd like to do today with them LOUDLY. He is crazy enough to get up at 6 am on a sleep-in-able morning to pop down to the gym for an hour. He is tinkering in the garage by 8 am. Mowing the lawn by 9am.  A ridiculously chipper morning person. 

Miss 18 is also a morning person. She is much more quiet than her Dad, but she is often in the kitchen by 7 am, sweet and cheerful. She does go back into her room and tried to not disturb Those Who Won't Wake. She accepts my grunts and growls and brings coffee to soothe the morning beasties. 

Back in the days of three wee small children ( and Miss 9 was just an idea) sleep-ins were but an elusive dream. Now they are attainable and plenty, I cannot, for the life of me, figure out why anyone would deny themselves the glorious pleasure. 

Which team are you on ?

Happy Birthday to our sweet girl

In a totally self indulgent photograph heavy Thankful Thursday Post , I am THANKFUL today for my beautiful daughter who turns 18 today.

From the minute we knew she was on her way, she has been the softest whisper in my heart, a gentle and forgiving soul.

She has been the sweetest smile on my saddest day and she never ceases to amaze me with her creativity and her kindness.

I look at the woman she is today and it just takes my breath away, that this lovely young lady has grown from our bumbling attempts at parenthood.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SWEET GIRL.

May all your dreams come true, just like ours did.

 XXX

Thankful Thursday xx

Daylight savings - Save me!

Daylight Savings ended last night.. a whole extra hour to stay snuggled in bed snoozing. Bliss!

Except that The Man I Married missed the teenage lesson on how to sleep in, so at 6.30am - which today became 5.30am , he woke up and decided to get up. 

Woke the dogs up and had a loud chat with them, banged around in the kitchen, turned on the TV and flicked channels.
Grrrrrrr.

GRRRRRR!

I don't know about you, but once I'm awake and disturbed I can't go back to sleep so there we both were, awake, nursing cups of coffee at 5.30am. 

I retreated into Computer land, mostly because I wasn't sure I could speak in pleasant sentences to the overgrown two year bouncing around on the couch.

I understand you are possibly sick of me raving about my refound designing mojo, but once you get something back that you loved, it's hard to squish that kind of Happy down. 
So here's what I made yesterday afternoon, and what you can feel free to download.

How cute is that ? This makes up into a little Easter Bunny Treasure box about 6.5cm high, perfect for a few Cadbury Eggs as a sweet little gift for someone.

You can grab the PDF to print it out HERE 

Don't just click and save this little picture as you box will be too tiny :-)

You basically cut around the outside edge, score all the solid lines with the back of a butter knife and a ruler and fold into the box shape, adding a lick of glue along the tab line to hold it together.

The bottom interweaves which gives it a little extra strength, and you can secure it with a bit of tape if you are loading the box with heavier items.

This mornings ridiculously EARLY start gave me time and head space to play a little more, so I made a second box... just in case you aren't into bunnies - although I don't even know how that is possible because :

Back to Box Making :

So this morning I made this:

Same deal, different pictures, a little brighter and funkier...

You can grab the PDF to print it out HERE

In case you can't tell, I'm having alot of fun!

What time did your little or big treasures get out of bed this morning?

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Would you like some chocolate with that?

One thing the USA is famous for is doing everything to the extreme.
They do Extreme Fishing, Extreme Mining, Extreme Cars, Extreme Abseiling..Extreme Cake Decorating,  Extreme Weddings, Extreme Piercings, Extreme Tattoos, Extreme Makeovers, Extreme Birth Stories... you name it, the USA has it covered.

So in my Pinterest Frenzy this week I started on a bit of an Easter binge.

Because there are so many awesome pins from people waaaaaaay more dedicated than me to:

Easter decorating

Easter making

And Easter Baking

\

Seriously ????

But time and time again I came across USA links to Easter Bunny Bark.


What Is That?

First of all, the bunny in my house doesn't eat bark - He prefers some short cut alfalfa sprouts, green tips only, a quarter of a freshly harvested carrot and the Spanish dried, late harvested, $35 a pound gooseberries from the island of Rabbit-Nirvana .

Secondly, the Easter Bunny at my house does not qualify for a stop over snack
(I thought that was Santa . Milk and cookies or in our case Beer and some peanuts please)

Thirdly.. .... ... ... umm ...  seriously, you make this stuff for imaginary characters???

But as it happens, and it happens often, I got converted, sucked in and won over...

so tonight before ballet....

Miss 9 and me made Easter Bunny Bark.

Basically you chop up some toppings (read : what ever Mum could find leftover on the back of the "saving it for Christmas" cupboard):

You melt some white chocolate into liquid form:

You sprinkle the goodies over the good stuff:

And smash it all down.

Cool in the fridge til firm and chop into manageable pieces:

Happy Days!!!

We are so freakin' ready for the Easter Bunny, It's not even funny right now,

( **  Also I might have Type 2 diabetes from all the sugar I have consumed today. Seriously. ** )

What have you made that makes your head and blood sugar level spin?